I am my own Magnum Opus
4 weeks have passed since I freebirthed my son, Zenith at home in Kuranda.
I am slowly starting to emerge out of my sacred bubble- which includes sharing online.
There is SO MUCH I have swirling around inside that I need to anchor in written word, though as you can imagine, a bit of a challenge to drop in most days.
For a multi-faceted creative, taking time off to spiral inwards has been incredibly beautiful yet frustrating… because I quite literally had to SURRENDER to the simplicity of being totally immersed in life at home. Immersed in the Being, with little doing.
During this sacred time, I’ve been questioning my identity and the way I define myself… now a Mother of 4 (6 on school holidays)
My laptop stayed untouched for around 3weeks.
Unprecedented when it has become my main tool for creating and weaving majick.
So I began to really delve into who I am beyond the digital space. How I show up IRL vs Online…
If the grid failed and there was no interwebs- who am I in the world, and more importantly HOW do I serve?
When I was 21 I began to stockpile resources, I began to critically evaluate life as we know it, and would often get to the point of thinking about the collapse of unnatural systems… and if that was to happen, what skills do I bring to the community that provide value.
This is when I started learning about permaculture and my bookshelf switched from Spiritual and Esoteric texts, to practical books about growing food, first aid, natural health and wellness, home building survival etc.
I figured these books would become such valuable resources should google be unavailable.
So anyways…
This recent questioning has allowed me to really look at my life and focus on what needs to be stripped back.
What is really important in my life
and you know what…
I reached this place inside of myself, that even if my dreams did not come to fruition…
If I was not successful…
If my businesses failed…
If my health waned…
If I never “amounted” to anything other than what I am in this moment… if this was actually as good as it gets…
I would still be so incredibly grateful and happy in life.
I would still be leaving an incredible legacy as a woman doing her best.
That the greatest offering I have ever given of myself in full creative expression and wild truth, is ultimately the journey I am deepening into as a MOTHER… 11 years, 4 spirals in.
and I realised…
as a creative being…
I am my own Magnum Opus…
There is no greater work in this world for me, than that I am carving out as Mother.
The Womb is our sacred chamber… the library that imprints us with stories and timelines beyond the scope of what we know in our own lifetime.
Feel into that for a moment.
It is not to negate or invalidate anyone else’s experience, though when you strip it back to the most simple truth, Mother is our first sense of home and belonging, out connection to love, safety, country and community.
In the purest and most connected form, She is the sacred landscape that offers of her heart and body in complete devotion…
She will give of herself freely in the name of love and hope.
it is her nature!
Yet she will roar her fierce and primal wild, if she is disrespected…
ESPECIALLY if she disrespects herself…
She will unleash like extreme weather and furious fire, to cleanse, disintegrate, release, and bring herself back into alignment… into her flow.
as Nature.
And all of that is in me, as a Wombman… in the season of Mother.
and all that I give, is in fact, valuable.
So as I slowly emerge, with a new key to my own Mystery- I feel more grounded, peaceful, connected and embodied than ever before.
And I wanted to take a sneaky moment to share these musings with you, hoping I’ve pieced it together enough to make sense in this moment.
xx
D
